Ladies of the forum, will you please desist from crashing my computer with your PM demands of my action shot image placed on this thread by my personal photographer Bunter, who always manages to get my good side.

To answer the most asked questions about the above annual Methodist outing the answers are as follows:
1. The two young ladies images shown, I am afraid, have been air brushed by Bunter as they are 80 yrs old rejected Mormon gin makers ( and dam good gin at that ).
2. The ungainly speed of myself leaving the reinforced chair was down to a dodgy lemon curd pie THANK YOU MICHEAL.
3. Unlike Micheal's comments of the now famous inserted cucumber, it does not have any religious significant in our sect but maybe related to the Catholics.

Now young Micheal my lad, why has the apology in print not been put on the forum? I will tell all.
At the Methodist cooking class for hopeful would be wives and dodgy males Micheal tampered with the recipe type head for the letters C and T changing them round for the Lemon Curd Pie making class and so it was not as it should have been shown. Due to this prank and the stench left in the hall after the cooking class, we have now been refused use of this hall for the up and coming iron brew drinking competition between the local Muslims and ourselves and it has had to be cancelled.

To update you about the policia officer he still cannot bring himself to walk past a greengrocers.
Yours an all action Bulldog.