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Do You Know Jack Schitt? (Read 2419 times)
hazelnut
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Do You Know Jack Schitt?
Feb 2nd, 2009 at 7:32pm
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WHO IS JACK SCHITT ?

For some time many of us have wondered just who is Jack Schitt? We find ourselves at a loss when someone says, 'You don't know Jack Schitt!' Well, thanks to my genealogy efforts, you can now respond in an intellectual way.

Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep N. Schitt, Inc. They had one son, Jack.

In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt. The deeply religious couple produced six children: Holie Schitt, Giva Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt.

Against her parents' objections, Deep Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout. After being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced. Noe Schitt later married Ted Sherlock, and because her kids were living with them, she wanted to keep her previous name. She was then known as Noe Schitt Sherlock.

Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt, and they produced a son with a rather nervous disposition named Chicken Schitt. Two of the other six children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, were inseparable throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony. The wedding announcement in the newspaper announced the Schitt-Happens
nuptials. The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and Horse.

Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He recently returned from   Italy  with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt. Now when someone says, 'You don't know Jack Schitt,' you can correct them.

Sincerely,
Crock O. Schitt
  
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viking
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Re: Do You Know Jack Schitt?
Reply #1 - Feb 2nd, 2009 at 8:48pm
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My word, you have done your research! You must be knee deep in shit by now!! Tongue
  
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viking
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Re: Do You Know Jack Schitt?
Reply #2 - Feb 2nd, 2009 at 8:49pm
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Of course I meant shit, not nuts!!
  
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viking
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Re: Do You Know Jack Schitt?
Reply #3 - Feb 2nd, 2009 at 8:53pm
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Oh, give me a break, so I'm not allowed to say sh****t, come on this is 2009 not 1809!!!
  
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old nelson
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The man in black

Posts: 215
Location: HAYES KENT..and...TORTOSA
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Re: Do You Know Jack Schitt?
Reply #4 - Feb 2nd, 2009 at 10:34pm
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From the smell that's coming down the ether I think Nut forgot the farmyard favourite pig s***t,he seems to have covered every other kind!!
  
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hazelnut
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Re: Do You Know Jack Schitt?
Reply #5 - Feb 3rd, 2009 at 8:50am
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I forgot to mention the distant relatives of the Schitts, the Thomas Crapper clan , and his chinese cousin Huw Flung Dung, sorry for the oversight, but my eyes were watering
  
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