Always wear clean underwear in public, especially  when working  under your vehicle...From the Northwest Florida  Daily News comes this  story of a Crestview couple who drove their car to

Wal-Mart, only to  have their car break down in the parking lot.

The man told his wife to carry on with the shopping while he  fixed the car in the lot. The wife returned later to see a small group  of people near the car.

On closer inspection, she saw a pair of male legs  protruding from under the chassis.

though the man was in shorts, his lack of underpants turned private parts into glaringly public ones.

Unable to stand the embarrassment, she dutifully stepped forward, quickly put her hand UP his shorts, and tucked everything back into place.

On regaining her feet, she looked across the hood and found herself staring at her husband who was standing  idly by.

 

The mechanic, however, had to have three stitches  in his forehead.

Ok,Here goes another one

FIRST CHRISTMAS JOKE


>
> Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the Pearly 
> gates.
> "In honour of this holy season," Saint Peter said, "you must each possess 
> something that symbolises Christmas to get into heaven."
> The first man fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He 
> flicked it on. It represents a candle, he said.
> You may pass through the Pearly gates, said Saint Peter.
> The second man reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He 
> shook them and said, "They're bells."
> Saint Peter said you may pass through the pearly gates.
> The third man started searching desperately through his pockets and 
> finally pulled out a pair of women's knickers.
> St. Peter looked at the man with a raised eyebrow and asked, "And just how 
> do those symbolise Christmas?"

Wait for it!!!!!!



> The man replied, "They're Carols."
>  And So, The Holiday Season Begins....!   

Xmas Jokes.

1.Why doesn't Santa have any children??

Because he only comes once a year and when he does it's down a chimney!

2.Reindeer trots into a bar late Xmas Eve and orders a large gin and tonic and downs it in one, then orders the same again and knocks it back in one again. The barman gave him the bill and says" Do you know your the first reindeer I've ever served in here" and the reindeer say's " At your f-----g prices I' not surprised!"