Nice one Nigle.
How diplomatic!
The Prestamo( The praise )
Bon day. I come to request a credit.
-Charmed of paying attention you, Jordi present. Let us see... ¿what quantity requests?

-1 Euro

1€?...? Please, Jordi present: It is not to necessary to request a credit for that quantity. Can Vd. withdraw those of whoever of your accounts. It is serve it of your current account or of your notebook of economy?

It have this that want that concede me to him a POR UN EURO credit-if not me concede it, cancel the account, the notebook, the buttom of inversions and go me to other bench, |collons|!

-OH, not, Jordi present, please! Not me |malinterprete|. Of course not have any inconvinient in conceding your credit, it is missing more.
Well..what term wants?

A month.

¿A month?... Well, in any way whatever a short term will apply you an interest of a 10 %... and for be vd. one of our better clients, will stop it in 5%. ¿Agrees you?

Molt bars. As guarantee, I want leave the Mersedes.

¿The mercies? ¡But, Jordi present! For that quantity it is not necessary that leaves us any guarantee. Moreover, by treating of Vd., is more than enough any guarantee...

¡It have this that want stops to EL MERSEDES guarantee! If not me accept it, cancel the account, the notebook, the buttom of inversions and go me to other bench, |coñy|!

¡Oh, not, not, Jordi present! ¡Please ! We gladly accept your guarantee, of course. It can leave it in the parking of the office. 
Now, not has not more that signs here. That is. Very comfortably placed, Jordi present. Thank you very much and to your disposition. Until sudden impulse.

Don Jordi reaches to house and |exultante| is directed to your woman: ¡¡Montserrat!! already can go us of holidays!
¡¡¡I FOUND WATCHED PARKING FOR THE MERSEDESES DURING A MONTH. AND FOR ONLY 1.05 EUROSES !!!

PD: Lest the |catalanes| are stick you... Which are to be good
¡MERCHANTS!

Now which badly written machine translator came out with that rubbish? Learning the language is a lot less painful and much more fun... you get an insight into 'Real' Spain and not the 'English coccoon' that some like to live in... Go, translate, homework (deberes), surely more fun than 'Miguel and Maria are sat outside a café having a coffee....'

Now, ¿Agrees you anyone ?to give a praise to buy that new car, or a notebook to keep a list of my buttom of inversions in?

Until sudden impulse..

PD: Lest the Scottish are stick you.. Which be good merchants!

Well, if that's the quality of translators, and that's what people are relying on when they receive legal documents, buy property, request building permissions etc. etc. is it suprising that they run into trouble?

Maybe they should invest in one of these instead - instant translation without the pain of actually having to take the time and effort to learn  

Until sudden impulse (I just love that one!!!)